Well lets see a this point in 2008:
* I had just split with Paul and good riddance to him, his drinking and his mother.
* I had an OK job but a horrendous commute.
* Financially I was good.
* I loved my house.
I was feeling lonely and unfulfilled with work and life in general.
In February work sent me to Melbourne for a Rare Book Summer School. There was no reason to send me, but the boss wanted more people on courses and I have a love of old things so I was one of two people who got to go.
This did two things:
* Reawaken my love for old materials and my desire to complete Masters in Cultural Conservation
* Put me back in touch with an old friend.
The old friend was Stephen and most of you here know the rest of that story.
Easter I spend in Melbourne again with Stephen and met another old friend from the SCA. One who didn't spit at me as soon as see me. This is an area of my life that I had been avoiding since the marriage breakup seven years ago. My ex-husband had careful spread rumors about me and destroyed what reputation I had in that group before we split up. Ever walk into a room of about 30 acquaintances and have them all literally turn their back on you? I have.
This is, to be honest, part of the reason I really was unsure about starting another relationship with Stephen - he knew of a lot of these people and I would come in contact with some of them again through the circles he moves in.
But that Easter, in the kitchen at the convention with Taffy really boosted my self-esteem in that area. I will not ever rejoin the SCA but I can stop running from them now.
Easter was also a time when I finally got Paul out of my life for good. Traumatic but necessary. We could not "remain friends" the way I had wanted.
The next few months passed in a flurry of constant communication with Stephen, countless hours commuting, countless hours whinging about the commuting, a workplace that was progressively getting easier and better to work at, and a little stitching.
In June Stephen and I were engaged for three days. During this month I received a temporary promotion at work and I was significantly reducing my debts.
In July I was informed that my landlady was kicking me out to sell the place, and I placed a job application with RMIT University in Melbourne.
In September after a lot of angst and anxiety and spending every cent I could lay my hands on, I arrived in Melbourne via my mum's place where she had had significant health issues.
A couple of weeks into the job and living in the new house I realised I had made major errors in assumptions and I am now bringing home significantly less disposable income than I was before the move.
In October Stephen announced our engagement officially. We dealt with angst and negativity from all the expected (and a couple of unexpected) quarters.
In December I became an Aunty again.
Now it is January 2009. Monday. Stephen left last night to return to Perth. I start work again tomorrow.
I am still horrendously broke and owe a lot more money than I would ever wish to, to areas I would rather not owe money. I have a job I like inside a department I hate. I hate working there, I hate my manager, my co-team leader and most of my staff. Hate hate hate.
I love being in Melbourne.
I love my house.
I love Stephen.
I have always and will always love Trubs.
I am slowly learning to live within my new means.
I wont have my debts paid off for years and I wont be able to afford the Masters degree for many years. But I'm aware of this and learning to live with this too.
I have no friends here yet, but hopefully that will change.
All in all, although my life is not perfect, (far from it in terms of finances and job happiness) I think I am in a better position within myself than I was at this time last year.
I made a few adjustments with my superannuation payments, and acquired a freezer and some sports bras in the post Christmas sales so I can start working on the health and financial issues now.
I have a cat and a man that love me very much and I can afford to pay the bills that are due this week.
That's enough for now.
I will probably change my tune as soon as I go back to work tomorrow - but for today there's stitching and the cricket is about to start!
11 comments:
The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with eager feet,
Until it joins some larger way
Where many paths and errands meet.
And whither then? I cannot say.
I think you sound happier than you did a year ago. The bad stuff is more external now rather than internal, and surely that's good progress. The debt part sucks - while we're not desperately in debt, we're also not in a position to clear it off right now and I hate that, so I have a feeling for where you're coming from. Hope you can steadily work on it. Here's to a great 2009!
You are definitely happier and less stressed than this time last year which is a good thing.
You have a man in your life whom you adore and who makes you happy.
You love Melbourne and I have a great friend there whom you must meet.
All in all, apart from the money thing, your life is so much better,.
I can only echo what has already been said - from my perspective, you are in a much better place than a year ago - and I don't know anyone that isn't feeling the financial bit right now, so even though the current job actually yields you less than the old, it's also a different environment that you're having to put it back into; it would be likely different even at the old job/old home, to some degree. It will work itself out, given time! Here's hoping 2009 is everything you hope for, and a lot more!
Exactly what they said! And really, the internal stuff is what is most important :) I hope at this time next year, you're feeling even happier!
Claire put it very well. Unless you work for yourself NO job is ever going to be perfect. If it is, then you are one of the very few lucky ones. You've got a man, a roof over your head, friends who love you, a cat who loves you almost as much as Mr TB so you definitely have more pluses than minuses. OK you have a large debt but it can be paid off with a lot of determination. Heres hoping as 2009 goes on you feel better and better about everything.
I've had jobs that have been better than this one. Yeah I know, don't whinge about your job - at least you have one.
Breakfast and then I'm off {sigh}
Have a good day and just think of the paycheck at the endof the month
Sometimes it seems like we trade one problem for another, but then things have a funny way of working out for the best. I think you are better off then where you were and I hope that the 2009 is a great year for you!
Certainly seems like more ups than downs lately. Hope that will continue with you into 09. I think your debt is pretty typical these days.....it will get better with continued will power.
Ah, Mel! What a year. You had so many huge changes. I hope 2009 will give you the year you deserve!!
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