Yes I'm whining - feel free to ignore.
One of the aspects of my Myers Briggs personality test is that I get easily irritated when others refuse to take decisive action.
Another aspect is that I must be more aware that change can be far more difficult for other people than myself.
Although about as accurate as Astrology - I think these two statements do apply to me. And they both apply in situations at work and at home at the moment. That's why I'm whining here instead of at the people I really want to whine at.
,.
Also today is the funeral. My supervisor's secretary suicided from depression last Friday. We got the news mid-morning Monday. As the only person in the office who hasn't known her for at least 10 years I had to keep the office running this week and represent the section at various meetings etc that my supervisor wasn't up to attending,. I was also being the rock in the office for all the girls to come to as I would supply tissues and a shoulder.
I only knew her and worked along side her for three weeks, but it was enough to feel some grief. I just do my crying at home. Its easier on everyone this way.
Oh well - whining time over - time to get my shoes on and remember how many debts I still have to pay off.
16 comments:
Sorry about the girl in the office. That always makes things awkward and nobody is at their best or deals with it easily. Your super must be really having it hard if she had been there that long. I'm sure he'd be reeling if she had just split town suddenly, but this is a double punch.
BTW, which Myers Briggs bin did you jump into?
My super was down and out for the rest of the day last Monday. She just cried and cried.
She's been out of it for the rest of the week and took today off completely to attend the funeral - which I think is a good move ....
As the rumors started circulating and bits and pieces came to light, there was a LOT of self-recrimination going on in the department. I overheard X, I should have said something. I saw she was tired, why didn't I say something.
Its been a very hard week on the whole department ...
After going through it in a LOT more detail I am an INTJ.
Hallmark: Vision
Independent, individualistic and visionary, INTJs work well when they can develop strategies, use foresight, implement their ideas, and create intellectual structures to meet goals. Unafraid of difficulty, they objectively analyze varied factors and global issues to meet complex challenges they can foresee in the future.
May irritate team members by:
* Seeing outcomes so vividly I can't understand why others don't
* Refusing to share responsibilities
* Paying insufficient attention to the impact of change on people
* Taking an adversarial attitude
My be irritated by team members who:
* Don't respect my need to ask probing questions
* Leave agreed-upon tasks unfinished
* Are threatened by debate and see questions as personal attacks
* Appear irrational, illogical or ignorant.
Yup - I can see all of those flaws ....
INFP to INTJ - yup, a bit like a character assassination really. Bit of that are rather close to the knuckle are they not?
I know you will be glad when this week is over, but you have done really well by everyone. Keep your chin up. It will get better.
I was going to have a whine myself tonight (looong story) but thankfully you have distracted me. Thanks Mel, ma amie!
OH I was going to have a longer whine myself including a diatribe on why the cardboard box for my breakfast cereal was three inches taller than the foil packet of cereal inside it ?????
But I got distracted by one of Stephen's friends here in Melbourne and spent some time cheering her up instead :)
That is a lot going on. And to go into work where you don't expect as much emotional miasma and still be going through all of that can be really rough. Good luck and hope next week goes better.
Oh, hugs honey! I can totally understand! I only knew Toad for around 3 years, didn't grow up with him, so of course it was a given that I wouldn't feel the 'need' to grieve for the boy, even though I had worked with him for almost two of those years.
Hugs to you, Dear.
And I just got told off by the HR officer because I kept talking over the top of Dickhead during the last meeting. The fact that he sets off all four of the "May Irritate me" clauses is apparently irrelevant.
{grump}
People are leaving work now to attend the funeral.
It was an early lesson for me - the one about changing! I learned early on that *I* can't change others, I can only change myself. I think it was the most important lesson to raise my tolerance level toward others. I'm sometimes tolerant to the point of indulgence because of it. But accepting that fact has made life easier to some degree. I don't bother to change others' opinions or attitudes, I just make mine own known and leave it at that.
Your first point, however, that I can fully relate to! Too many people 'in power' who care more about their image than doing things. Can't stand that.
Yep - this is the lesson I need to learn over and over and over again. When I get stressed or PMS or hurt or angry my tolerance levels reduce to zero.
And this week I have felt hurt and angry on the home front and very stressed on the work front. So yep I haven't been the most tolerant person.
Thank you! Seriously, its why I love my friends - you don't flinch from telling me when I'm out of line. And you help me to understand it too! Thank you!
Now meat and veg for dinner - or Waffles .....
Well I've done neither. I've been web-surfing. And in pursuit of introspection I found this.
One of my home issues this week has been resentment. In fact its been an issue with the same person (no none of you) for weeks.
I think this might help - especially as I've been referring to my issue as my "inner cave-woman" all day .....
http://thinksimplenow.com/happiness/how-to-overcome-resentment/
Well, what a week! I can't imagine having to deal with that kind of loss at work, having been there such a short time - I can just barely imagine all the things going through everyone's thoughts... Well, take the weekend to rebuild your reserves, and hopefully everyone else will, too, and next week will start getting back to "normal".
As for the resentment thing, that's one of my huge issues, too - as of right now, I'm okay carrying some of it around, since I like to stew more than is probably healthy. Some, I would gladly hand off, were it as easy as it sounds....
Commiserations on the crap week especially as being the "new girl" you seem to have had most of it dumped in your direction.
Marianne as usual is right. You cant change others attitudes,( well not without a whip and chair) . However, once you know where your problems lay then its up to you to decide about your own tolerance.
Dickhead sounds as if he is always going to be a problem. I can think of lots of things I personally would do but that would only exacerbate the problem or get me locked up.
Try and get a good stressfree weekend. Unwind and relax.
Thanks everyone. I decided this morning to focus on the positives. Read the next blog post :)
Well - belated commiseration. It's a lot to handle and absorb and deal with all at once. {sigh}. I hope the weekend helped you regain your balance! (And I'll be reading the next post...)
We had a great training/discussion session yesterday morning. All the library managers and supervisors attended a Health and Wellness int he Workplace session. Basically it focused in mental issues such as depression and stress and how they do affect the workplace.
We discussed this article:
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,23559940-2,00.html
And then discussed our legal requirements as an organization - LOTS of legal requirements. The onus is definitely on the workplace to be as accommodating as possible to people with any form of illness, carer's responsibilities, family responsibilities etc etc.
Quite an eyeopener - and one I definite respect the State of Victoria for. They have much more worker-friendly laws than NSW did.
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